Dear Me…

“I’ve never been that good at writing letters; always unsure of how to start or what to say. Do you treat it like a text message? Start with a “Hi, how are you?” in the hope that they’ll respond point by point… “Yeah I’m good thanks, my family are good, my dog is good, school is good…”.

To be honest, I’ve never really been any good with words, never been tactile with a pen, never been a wordsmith of sorts. But still, I find myself contemplating- pen in hand faced with the ice white cloud of paper before me. The vast, empty space taunting me with words unwritten, unheard, unspoken. Words that boil and brew deep inside, blind to expression or relief. Just boiling and brewing over and over, suffocating- desperate for a way out. I just don’t know how.

 

Fear.
Shame.

 

I understand these words. I feel these words. I allow myself to succumb to the threatening power they have over a sensitive soul that just longs to burst out and live in a moment of freedom. Oh, to feel that freedom. To lose the shackles of self doubt and self censorship and come toe to toe with the unforgiving ocean and spread my wings and glide over without a doubt or care.

 

You feel this way too? I know. I am you. You are me. Can I tell you everything changes for the better and that everything falls into place? I wish I could, but so is life’s tangled web that even now, I still find myself hanging in it’s murky mess. But I too, still have a journey to take, a path to travel. All I can say for certain is that you are good. You are right. You have love. You are loved.

 

Take it step by step, day by day. Let go of that immediate gratification- the dictatorship of the modern world. One day your heart will stop-it is inevitable. But your soul will fly. Prepare it. Nurture it. Believe it.

 

You Are! So Be!”

 

With the questions of having the right to be who you are being slandered and compromised, it is important we look at ourselves and think “what would you tell your younger self? What would you tell a younger stranger about the future?”

Acceptance and love is the answer.

 

 

The Magic Snow-globe

Have you ever thought
Or let it cross your mind,
All the many wonders
of Christmas time?

The festive turkey
And the tinsel on the tree
All the presents beautifully wrapped
For you and me

Well here’s a tale
For you all to share
With your friends and family
All gathered there.

A tale of an elf
Who lost his way
But restored the magic
of Christmas day.

So buckle up tight
‘Cause here we go
As we travel to a land
Filled with ice and snow.

Our story begins
With Rudy, the elf
Who- shall we say, wasn’t
Quite feeling himself.

Inside Santa’s workshop
The fire was aglow
Whilst outside the streets
Were wrapped up in snow.

Parents and children
And elves all alike
Were working hard making presents
For Christmas night.

They checked all the names
of those who were naughty and nice
They checked it once
And they checked it twice.

Then wrapped up the gifts
With a bow and a tag
All ready to be put
Into Santa’s big, red bag.

But hidden in a corner
Sat Rudy on his own,
He didn’t look excited
He seemed sad and alone.

For something troubled Rudy
Deep down inside
Something that this worried little elf
Could no longer hide.

With all the presents set to go
And all the reindeer fed,
The North Pole waited
For the world to go to bed.

In preparation for Santa
To fly on his sleigh
And deliver the toys
Before Christmas day.

As the workshop celebrated
Another successful year
No one but Santa noticed
That single, sad tear.

A tear that fell
From Rudy’s eye
And glistened like the precious
Stars in the sky.

The man in red
Sneaked over to Rudy the elf
To find out why he wasn’t
Quite feeling himself.

“Hello there, Master Rudy
Please, tell me why you cry
I would really like to help you
Before I take off in my sleigh and fly”

“I’m sorry Santa
I hate for you to see me in a state
Don’t you worry about me
I don’t want you to be late”

The troubled elf turned away
And Santa put his hand on Rudy’s shoulder
You can still ask for help, my boy
Even though you’re getting older”

Then Rudy turned to Santa
And wiped away his tears
Then slowly began to open up
About his struggles and his fears.

“I love my grandma very much
But she’s getting very old,
And slowly starting to forget
All the stories she once told

Like how she took me ice-skating
And made snowmen as a kid,
She’s slowly starting to forget
All of the fun things that we did”

Then Santa’s heart grew heavy
And sad and weary too,
His mind began to race
There must be something he could do.

But Santa had some advice
To give Rudy this Christmas Eve,
“All good things come to those who have faith
And all those who believe”

“I don’t quite understand”
Replied Rudy quite confused,
But Santa simply chuckled
And smiled back rather amused.

“For you I leave this snow-globe
Go and enjoy it with your Gran,
‘Cause memories last a lifetime
Even when you’re an old man”

So Santa left the snow-globe
And with a glint of magic in his eye,
Hollered, “HO! HO! HO!” and off he flew
Into the beautiful moonlit sky.

Rudy held the snow-globe
And prayed with all his might,
That his Grandma would remember him
And begin to see the light.

As the elf looked out of the window
He saw a holy star,
And recalled the shepards and three wise men
Who travelled from afar.

To see the baby Jesus
Who is King of all the earth,
And why every year on Christmas day
We celebrate his birth.

By sending presents just like the Kings and Shepards
To the people we love the most,
And sharing the magic of Christmas
With the ones that we hold close.

It was lights out at the workshop
So Rudy packed up ready to go
And give the snow-globe to his Gran
Once he’d journeyed through the snow.

When he arrived at his Grandma’s house
He sat down by the fire,
And in the street he heard the sound
Of the 10 strong local elf choir

Rudy’s Grandma didn’t remember him
And just sat there in her chair
She didn’t say much to Rudy
Just ran her fingers through her hair.

Rudy lowered his head
As the tears fell from his eyes,
Then all of a sudden the snow-globe began to glow
Much to his surprise.

The magic gift from Santa came to life
And revealed a lifetime of fun,
And caught Grandma’s attention
As she saw all the things they’d done.

How they went ice-skating and skiing
And carolling each December,
And to the joy of Rudy and his Grandma
She gradually began to remember.

For Grandma elf wasn’t going crazy
And she wasn’t losing her mind,
She just needed a little help
From someone compassionate and kind.

And in that moment Rudy felt
The true meaning of joy,
A felling of love and happiness
You cannot get from a toy.

The feeling of sharing Christmas
With the people that you love
Is a far more precious gift
That is given from above.

In the distance Rudy could hear
The bells on Santa’s sleigh,
As he made his way back to his workshop
Before Christmas day.

So Rudy wrote a note for Santa that read:
“Thank you” with a kiss,
Your beautiful, magic snow-globe
Has helped to make my Christmas wish.

So Merry Christmas one and all
And please do not forget,
To close your eyes and say your prayers
Before you go to bed

For no matter where you are in the world
Or what you do this Christmas eve,
Remember This:

All good things come to those who have faith and to all those who believe.